*If another can make you doubt yourself, you didn’t have much confidence to begin with!
* The silent child asleep is a joy. Otherwise, the silent child is into something they shouldn’t be into.
Short as life is, we make it shorter by the careless waste of time.
Are They Lying To You?
You must trust a friend or lover utterly. Any amount of doubt will slowly grow and poison your relationship. If you see or hear them lie to others, how will you believe anything they say to you? The simple answer is that you can’t! Oh, sure, you try; you pretend that someone who lies to evade work, obligations, bill collectors, that one would never lie to you about where they were or with whom. Wow, you’ll be so shocked when the truth arrives!
Look, I hate to burst your bubble, but anyone who lies, cheats or is dishonest with others will sooner or later do them to you. You aren’t sacred, or protected by some godly charm. If you haven’t caught them yet, its likely just a amatter of time, or they haven’t had a reason to make you a victim of their propensity to fudge the details. Being a dishonest sleaze is habit forming, apparently!
Now here’s the wicked part. Even if you suspect your friend or lover is a lying scumbag, you are obligated to act like they aren’t, until you have real evidence. You could be wrong or overly nervous, especially if you’ve been screwed over by someone before! Any hint that you don’t trust someone will poison the relationship if they aren’t doing any lying or sleazy thing, and if they are, you’ll just make them work harder to hide the truth if you prematurely blurt out your suspicions.
So what should you do? Simple. Be vigilant and pay attention, and be patient. Sooner or later, they’ll slip, and you’ll have them. Just don’t lie and deny the evidence. A liar or cheat won’t likely have a sudden change of heart when caught, and work to become a saint just for you. But while you’re on this subject, maybe you should take stock of your own track record. How many lies do you tell? Are you guilty of being a turd to others? Maybe you’d be wise to clean your own house a bit too? Before you get caught? Just a thought.
*If you wait to make decisions until you have one hundred percent complete and reliable information, you will make few decisions. Very few.
*Do not allow your children to practice any form of disobedience; they will quickly master it, much to your regret.
The greatest mistake you can make in life is to be continually fearing you will make one.
You’re Likely Hating The Wrong People
You’d probably deny it, but you likely hate someone. Whether it’s the person who cheated with your spouse, or the sleazeball who robbed and beat your aged mother, you don’t just dislike them; you despise and curse the ground they walk on. No horrid death would be too evil to have them experience. Do you hate the people who prey on the eldarly, who kill, rape and molest women and young children? Why not? Surely these deserve to be so regarded.
Or do you hate people from foreign countries, or another race, whom you don’t even know? Why? There are plenty of evil humans who deserve the most intense hate; why are you wasting your ire on the others who likely deserve none of your spite? Stop hating the innocent, and hate the people who have earned such a fate by their own wicked choices.
Understand this: God despises evil. Hates it. Will make the person who willingly wallows in it suffer the sternest atonement because of it. Your task is quite simple; don’t pity it, support it, tolerate it, sleep with it, give it money or comfort. God has the power to forgive and deal with the evil doer; that’s His place. Your’s is to stop appologizing for it. Hate it. Just stop hating the people who aren’t evil, but are just different from you. You aren’t God, after all.
Lots of misguided religious types think it’s their place to “forgive” the evil doer. Wrong. You have a much simpler task. Avoid doing evil. Avoid helping anyone else do evil. And despise the evil done by anyone else. Don’t listen to the fast talking attorneys who want you to feel sorry for the evil doer either. The attorneys all work for the devil. The victim of evil deserves your concern and care, not the one willingly choosing to do evil. And no one does evil other than by their own free will. Make sure you aren’t one of them.
*Debt probably destroys more marriages than cheating. The constant struggle to maintain it and the accusations regarding who’s most to blame for incurring it are a constant source of strife.
*If you would protect your health, avoid the doctor’s office; it’s full of sick people. Likewise avoid the hospital. Lots of people go there to die, and you don’t want to be among them!
It takes less time to do a thing right than to explain why you did it wrong.
Henry W. Longfellow
We Complain A Lot More Than We Probably Should
I had occasion to again receive a sterling example of terrible customer service ala my new cable/phone/internet provider. A crippled lemur would have done a better job of installing our stuff, and when he slithered off, two thirds of the system wasn’t working. I had a competitor put their system in the next day, and no such problems. To make matters worse, the wife had to argue with a dozen trolls to get the non-working system canceled.
You’ve had that happen at some point haven’t you? It seems to be a part of life these days. No one does as promised, no one does anything halfway correct, or even cares. They know their company is running a slave galley, so why should they get emotionally riled up for your benefit? What got me wondering is this: are we all that hot ourselves? It’s easy to denounce others for being stupid, unresponsive or useless, but how big is that moral mountain we’re standing on? Or does it resemble a small speed bump?
Frankly, I’d bet money that most people are as lacking in competence and virtue as the people they curse on a daily basis. I complain and have a fit over other people losing things and info, but some days I can’t find my own butt with a map, flashlight and two hands! Sorry. I’d suggest we try a better approach. Perhaps we should make a bit more effort to be helpful to the people we harp about? Or at least bitch a lot less!
Oh, sure, it’s fun to rant about other people’s incompetence, but if your failings were given a decent look see, you’d be pretty sad to. We’re not all that fabulous as a species, or as individuals as far as being efficient or on the ball. We’re good at lying to ourselves about our doings and abilities, not so willing to accept any well earned blame for being the divot we are, frankly. That has negative implications for your soul, if you’re inclined to care, and it just piles on the negative karma. God is no fan of such self-righteous foolishness either. Help more, complain less? Much better idea.
*Men should resist the urge to flirt with women as it is quite dangerous. By the time he decides to ask her to dinner, she’s likely mentally decorating their new home,
*There are many people who would welcome you to do good by them. There are far fewer who might return the favor.
The graveyards are filled with “indespensible” people.
You Are Needed. Why Does That Make You So Nervous?
I need you! What a marvelous plea that can be, at once touching your heart and telling you that at least one other soul wishes to have your care. They may need you from weakness, from desire or simply because they trust and like you. We all yearn to be needed, to be found worthy and of some use, Yet this is a worrisome declaration too.
How will you respond? Are you willing to give of your self, your time and energy, your heart and soul? If you aren’t eager or enthused, it becomes a burden. Saying no is likely to hurt the other person, and they may think you are suddenly a total cad, a turd with no heart or decency. You don’t want that, do you? But you don’t want to feel obligated or trapped either!
Perhaps you lack faith in your own ability to give what the other person needs. Or maybe you just don’t want to. Hearing these simple three words can turn you upside down pretty easily, especially if you’re sensitive and caring. You don’t want to be mean or nasty, don’t want to say something insensitive that sounds cruel. Yet there’s no way to say no that won’t hurt the one who just risked so much to tell you this, and you know it!
I suspect that many of you do a lot of hiding, trying to avoid having anyone put you in such a spot. It can be pretty awkward. We only want to be needed by certain people apparently, people who suit us. Anything else is just a burden. I’d suggest you practice saying no in a more loving manner, or even saying yes a bit more often. Loving and caring for others is the main reason you’re alive in this life. Failing to do so has consequences for your next life. You’ll find that a worse problem. Try saying yes a bit more often. You’ll certainly change this life, and for the better. You really will.
I just moved!
God, do I hate moving! We hauled 4 truckloads of stuff twenty miles last weekend, and I still can’t find anything. We’re in a nice old Victorian house now, after six years in a sub-terrarian home. The cats are just crazy in love with all the windows, where they can vultch the squirrls and birds. I’ve got zillions of boxes of books and paperwork to unpack and sort! Lots to do. Got to get back to writing; I’m behind on A Touch of Faerie!
*Many people seem to lose their mind when they open their mouth.
*Nudity should be the province of the young. Few of the rest of us are improved by removing our clothes!
It is as absurd to pretend that one can not love the same woman always, as to pretend that a good artist needs several violins to execute a piece of music.
Honor’e de Balzac