Duct Tape for the Soul for May 31 & June 1, 2014

You Don’t Need More Junk

I bet there’s something you’re just dying to buy, isn’t there? New TV, X-Box, I Phone, car, boat, furniture, grill, clothes. You think this will be the thing that finally makes you happy, gives substance and meaning to your life. Before you swipe that card, might I suggest you inventory the basement, attic, closets, garage. See all those other things you thought would bring you to orgasmic happiness? You just had to have every one of them, didn’t you?

So, how happy are you? If fifty other things failed to thrill you, what do you think the chances are that this new thing you’re lusting for…how long will that excite you? Long enough to pay off the charge card, or less? Allow me to explain something that you’ve likely missed; stuff won’t get you to paradise, won’t make your life a thing of love and wonder. All it will do is burden your soul. Not only are you going broke buying it, you need a bigger place to keep it, and then you have more to worry about, afraid someone will steal it!

Your problem is really pretty simple: you’re lonely and empty, lacking people and things of worth in your life. Your soul hungers for meaning and purpose, and having to buy, maintain, insure, and guard crap isn’t doing any of that! A person who has the things of value in their life, friends, someone to love, a purpose…they can be happy sitting and watching a rock. They don’t need a garage, barn and house full of crap that they use twice and then let collect dust.

Oh, sure, you hate that talk about love and relationships. Relationships are just so hard, aren’t they? Bad news; they’re a lot easier than working all the time to pay for all the crap you buy but don’t need! Feel a lot nicer too! Look, you can’t fill any empty life with stuff! That’s tantamount to the county peeing in potholes, instead of filling them with asphalt. You’re afraid of the good stuff because you’ve neglected to get familiar with it! Send most of your junk to Goodwill, and stop buying more. Go meet some people, and find a life. You’ll certainly have more money, and likely a lot fewer headaches. You’ll end up with some happiness too, a lot more than that thing you think you need will give you!


Bessie-isms and Quotable for May 31 & June 1, 2014


*The person who brings enthusiasm and eagerness is always welcome for any undertaking. People who have a good attitude are seldom alone.

*The birth of a first child does not signal the death of you as a couple, although it may feel that way. What it signals is the beginning of family.


When one door of happiness closes, another opens; but often we look so long at the closed door that we do not see the one that has been opened for us.

Helen Keller

Bessie-isms and Quotable for May 30, 2014


*You think you want luxury and ease in life. Foolish child, what you hunger for is Meaning; work which will satisfy and fulfill your soul. The person who has found their love, their passion, has no desire to relax, stop or retire. If you want rest, you are lost, and still searching for your life’s work.

*When a child declares something to have been an accident, it means they were not intending to do something careless, and they don’t want you to be mad at them. How much of your own life will you describe to God as an accident?


In extreme youth, in our most humiliating sorrow, we think we are alone. When we are older we find that others have suffered too.

Suzanne Moarny

Duct Tape for the Soul for May 30, 2014

Forgiving Once is Divine, Several Dozen Times Is Not

If you want to catch a glimpse of what divine forgiveness might feel like, try forgiving someone who’s done something crappy to you. Over coming the urge to be spiteful is certainly good for your heart and soul, and will make you look more like a saint than you’d appear otherwise.

Of course, being a stingy turd with this is the easy path; who hasn’t succumbed to the temptation to hold a grudge, or to try and get even with someone? It mostly seems our default setting, unfortunately. Naturally, you always have some feeling of guilt. It isn’t just religion that condems such wickedness, most of society’s laws and moral codes demand that you at least refrain from doing evil to get even.

It’s one thing to not talk to someone, another to shoot them, or burn their house down. Still, without violating the law, we still find plenty of harmful and sleazy things to inflict on someone we’re mad at! If you understood how much you’re damaging your own soul, you’d maybe be less inclined to do so? The fact is pretty simple; failing to forgive people does you more harm than it does them.

Naturally, people who’ve done you wrong would just love to be forgiven. No one likes to be ignored, abused, gossiped about, or to have their butt kicked by the person they’ve offended. Many people come with a sincere sounding appology, and beg your forgiveness, especially significant others, when threatened with divorce or banishment. Go ahead and forgive them. Once. Don’t be so quick to forgive them, especially for the same offense, the second time. By three and beyond, just kick their butt and move on. Jesus said to forgive those who offend you. But neither he nor anyone else said you had to be a doormat for some weasel!


Bessie-isms and Quotable for May 29, 2014


*You are disappointed when you don’t receive something you think you deserve. You are equally disappointed when you don’t receive something you don’t deserve, if you had hoped for it in spite of knowing you shouldn’t.

*An optimist believes that the next marriage will be better than the last one. A pessimist believes the next divorce will likely be worse than the one just past. Guess who has the better chance of being correct?


The difference between perserverance and obstinacy is that perserverance means a strong will and obstinacy means a strong won’t.

Lord Dundee

Duct Tape for the Soul for May 29, 2014

Death Brings More Than Grief

No one is all that fond of funerals, if they don’t have a screw or two loose. You have to admit, attending them is pretty much a drag. Well, assuming you weren’t hoping for the deceased person’s demise! You’d hope most of the tears shed were from some sort of sadness, and not the fact that poor uncle Lou kicked the bucket without paying anyone the money he owed them, and for which debt there is no written record!

I’ve attended several funerals where my sadness was for the fact that the event couldn’t have been held twenty years sooner, but I know that makes me seem mean and spiteful. Sorry. I’ve considered this whole ordeal over the years, and have concluded that many of the tears shed at funerals aren’t just from a sense of loss; they’re from an over-reaching sense of guilt! It seems that the death of most people always catches people in arears as to their relationships.

You likely would be in the same bind. How many people are you current with, on your declarations of love and affection? You’ve likely neglected to stay in touch with several, or to say, I love you as often as you know you should. One of them drops dead, and you will feel like a heel! Thus, the tears and misery. Once granny is cold and stiff, you can stand at the casket and say it until you pee yourself, but you know the ship has sailed, and you missed it!

There’s way too much quiet at funerals, and that lets you conscience just kick your butt no end. After all, the dead person doesn’ care anymore, has no worry, no pain. You should be thrilled for them, but instead, you stand and snivel, wishing you could have one more hug. You’d be wise to remember this more, and work harder at staying in touch, in not letting things this important slide to the side of your road. It’s bad enough to lose someone you like; it’s much worse to know you didn’t do what you should have, and there’s no second chance.



Bessie-isms and Quotable for May 28, 2014


*You can not make someone love you. Can not con, manipulate, persuade, entice, buy, beg, or plead them into surrendering their heart to you. You will likely try several of these, before you learn better, however.

*The things that will truely bring you happiness are the ones your soul yearns for. You’ll know when you find one, as you’ll feel much like a four year who’s just been handed a box full of kittens.


The difficulty is to know conscience from self-interest.

W. D. Howells

Duct Tape for the Soul for May 28, 2014

Do You Neglect The Important Things?

Ever have to dig through your clothes basket, (or worse, the pile), sniffing your dirty panties and clothes, to find something that is less offensive than most, because you’ve been lazy, and not bothered to do the laundry? Teens and college kids do so all the time, but I’d bet my shorts that lots of you are still doing this well past 25, 30, maybe even 50! Go ahead and laugh at yourself; God knows, everyone else would, even those with the same tendency! God would find that amusing too, at least compared to your other wicked failures!

Of course, your mother likely warned you against wearing dirty undies, (or worse, not wearing any at all!), but it’s easy to get in the habit of sloth. You’re likely lazy about staying in touch with people too, aren’t you? It’s easy to think, “I’ll call them next week,” but you somehow never do. It’s always shocking when someone dies, and you realize you never took the time to say I love you! one last time. Embarrassing, yes?

What I want you to consider is this; Life happens. The penalty for ignoring someone dear, for not saying I love you when you should can be a wicked burden to drag around! It’s certainly worse than wearing not so fresh undies! Here’s a good suggestion. Dig out those numbers, for grandma, for Aunt Ethyle, and while you’re belatedly doing your laundry, call a few of them, just to say hello. And I love you. Those calls are like fabric softener on your relationships; they keep them fresh and nice!


Duct Tape for the Soul for May 27, 2014

Evaluate Your Friends

Let’s examine your friends a moment, shall we? How often are you mad at them? Do they disappoint you? Hurt your feelings frequently? Act thoughtlessly towards you? Are they just giving you back the crap you give them, or are you just an innocent victim? Are you mad because they won’t cater to your whims, won’t help you do stupid things that you want to do?

Did someone appoint you God? tell us! I’d bet money your friends would have a different take on this, if we asked them, especially if you weren’t standing there, yes? Maybe you just need to lighten up. You’d be a better friend if you did. It’s easy to want to be the one everyone leans on, but its even easier to be a bossy a-hole! Oops!

You can have great friends, but if you don’t appreciate them properly, don’t do your fair share to help the relationship, you won’t have them long. If your freinds are a bunch of trolls, who only want to use your stuff, well, that’s your fault, isn’t it? Why’d you let such a dysfunctional group get attached to you? Losers are like barnacles; you have to scrape them off ever so often. But make sure you aren’t the barnacle!

Look, I’ve had my share of lousy friends too. I put up with several because I thought that they were better than being alone. Eventually I grew up, and learned that being alone was much better than hanging with losers! Duh. You put up with people you don’t like or honestly respect for a variety of reasons; they’ve got a truck you can borrow, they loan you money when you’re broke, they have a hot brother or sister you’d like to sleep with! Be honest, we’ve all done it! It is worth the effort to find and maintain good friends. Just ask yourself this; if you are so perfect, and your friends suck, whose fault is that? Good luck finding better friends!