Bessie-isms:

*How can you fear death? You lie down each night and go to sleep, which is exactly how death is, yet you are eager for sleep, having no idea if you’ll even wake up again!

*Women insist on talking before consenting to have sex normally. This is very important, for without this, men would soon lose the ability to engage in conversation at all, reverting to grunts and noises like their primitive ancestors.

Quotable:

Tired mothers find that spanking takes less time than reasoning and penetrates sooner to the seat of the memory.

Will Durant