Bessie-isms:

*The guilty person will never accept that another might be less guilty than themselves. Pray that you never have one of these on a jury deciding your fate!

*You may think a dog is a better companion than the opposite sex but I’ve yet to have a woman chew up my furniture, or poop on my carpet.

Quotable:

All the things I really like to do are either immoral, illegal or fattening.

Alexander Woolcott