Duct Tape for the Soul for September 13 & 14, 2014

Your Children Will Beg; Let Them!

You’re going to think I’m completely heartless. Considering the alternative was for me to end up even more broke than I am, I’d have to say, Too bad!  My kids were no different thatn yours, or any others, honestly, and by the time they were two, they had learned how to beg. Having a cute toddler begging for more cookies at home is cute; having them throw a screamming tantrum in a shopping cart at the store is not cute!

When our herd was young, the wife was confronted by four whining, begging crying, fit throwing toddlers and elementary aged children at the checkout one day. She did what any of you should do, when confronted by this mass manipulation; she left the cart, dragged the kids to the car, and took them home to me, then went back to shop alone. Can you say fate worse than death for four kids behinds? After that session with Mr. Paddle, and a month stuck at home with me, while mom shopped, they were like new kids!

Needless to say, we never saw such a display again. No public beating, which is what your grandparents would have administered on the spot, but the same results. Naturally, as they got older, the begging re-emerged, but more sneaky and refined. “Say dad, I need a new Model Mark X-Forty Nine Turbo widget for school! Everybody has one! Even Susie, the gril with the crazy nature freak parents got one!” How did I handle that nonsense? Sorry junior, I had no idea there were that many irresponsible parents in this place. No!

Naturally, they threatened to have bad self esteem, if we didn’t give in. Worse, they used the old, They’ll make fun of me! plea. I just explained that they were going to be made fun of anyway for something, but my having money in the bank later, when they wanted a car, might be more wise. They never did agree, but gave up. I finally got them to quit begging entirely, when I announced at the dinner table, that they could have anything they wanted once they turned sixteen, as long as it was leagal. All they had to do was get a job, save the money and buy it themselves. Dead silence. Quietest dinner we ever had!

Lots of you parents aren’t smart enough to outwit your kids. You go broke buying them anything they whine for. I swear that some of you would buy them a canister of nerve gas, if they cried long enough for one! Your kids mostly beg for things because they can, or because some other kid with morons for parents have been stupid and bought their offspring something expensive or dangerous. You need to grow some gonads, and learn to say no! That actually works on spending, as long as you don’t let them swipe your credit card!

Jack

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